Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Goodbye Dickwad!


Today is the day. George W. Bush, the village idiot who would be king, finally gets his marching orders. From my little corner of the web, may I say a fond "piss off" and, of course, farewell.

First, I think it's only fair to acknowledge the positives. What about the good things that George W. Bush brought us?

I'm sure some of you are expecting me not to have any positives. To leave a big blank space under this question and then move on to the negatives. Well, I must admit that was a temptation. But there's actually something pretty great about Bush:

He looks like Bear in the Big Blue House. Seriously. Go Google and check. That's cool, is it not?

So, positives over...

It would be too easy to list some of his quotes. I mean, he has said some of the absolute dumbest things I have ever heard a man say. We all know that. We can all use what he has said to make him out to be an idiot. Just too easy. And I've heard some people say, well, if you had to speak in public, you'd get flustered and mixed up too. Actually, no. Firstly, I can string a sentence together, which is a big plus. And, secondly, he's not just getting mixed up. He's a dumbass. And nobody should let a dumbass run a country. Any country. But especially one with as much firepower as the US.

And then some people say that we underestimate him. Is there truth in that?

Perhaps. But look around your community. Your circle of friends. Out of the people you know, can you find anyone better equipped to form a sentence? A little more level-headed? Someone you would trust with a simple task?

If you can't find someone close to you better equipped to run a country, you're likely reading this from prison. Or a home for people with special needs. Or possibly a creche. Even then, look to that kid stuffing yellow crayons into his mouth - he may well be better equipped. And what are you doing reading this from a creche? It's highly inappropriate. But if there is a town out there with nobody equalling Bush's intellect, I'd love to hear about it though because I imagine it could be a great source of entertainment and the entire town should get a TV show.

No, let's be honest. George W. Bush is a dick.

Which would be absolutely hilarious if it weren't for the lives and livelihoods he has totally and utterly destroyed. Gitmo is an absolute fucking disgrace. He levelled Afghanistan on the search for some mystery man on dialysis that he never found. He created a modern Vietnam in Iraq, leaving the country in a far worse condition than it had been under the dictator the US had initially supported. And where were the fucking WMDs? Didn't matter. It didn't matter because Bush had that invasion planned pre-9/11 and I know because I heard the army broadcasts where he jumped at the opportunity to prime troops for war when those Towers went down.

George W. Bush is a dick, plain and simple.

And he did his damndest to bring his war to Iran too. In fact, had people died in that emergency landing in the Hudson (which was bloody amazing by the way), he would have been chasing those terrorist geese to Iran, I guarantee it. If he doesn't launch some sort of strike before he gets his coat to leave the White House, I'll be pleasantly surprised.

I honestly feel sorry for the man who has to attempt to clean up his shit. I can't help feeling he has a losing battle ahead of him. I mean, it's like trying to do a Rubik's Cube, except it's one that has been chewed up by a dog and several of the stickers are missing. It's a tough task. But, hey, let's wait and see I guess.

As for Bush, well, he'll go off and live on a nice healthy fat pension, plumped up by cheques from corporations he has supported over the years. Yeah, it'll be a good life for George W. Bush. But probably a simpler life, one more suited to his talents.

I can't really imagine how it is for the people of the US. It kind of looks like he did little to nothing for your country and just used his wars as a diversion so you wouldn't notice. I don't think it worked. At least, that's how it looked from the outside. Kind of like that time Clinton dropped a few bombs to take attention away from his blow job. But, for the rest of us in the world, I can't speak for everyone but, for me, the world feels like a slightly safer place. A place where I don't have to be as terrified by the words 'freedom' or 'democracy', because if someone threatened to bring either of those to your country in the last eight years, you knew you were going to be lucky to end up with limbs at the end of it.

Yeah, for us on the outside, I think the world becomes a little more hopeful.

Goodbye George. May the next shoe that comes your way make its mark.

Phew. Now, after that celebration, I think I'm going to have to drop the politics for a while. Not good for my state of mind.


susan said...

The bear in the blue house. Oh Snarf! My morning cup of coffee all over my iBook.

Positives of W= he made a lot of money for the comedians who made fun out of him.

- Barney the first dog. Barney was born in a farm about 10 miles from where I live. That is kinda cool, no?

So Animator- I am sending you a Guiness from across the pond, and hope you don't mind celebrating with a cyber beer.

Have a wonderful day. The sun came out on the East coast- we got snow last night and it will be a beautiful day in Washington.

Lisa G said...

"Get the hell off my property, bitch"--priceless! I'm so glad that wanker is gone.

Red Pill Junkie said...

"As for Bush, well, he'll go off and live on a nice healthy fat pension, plumped up by cheques from corporations he has supported over the years. Yeah, it'll be a good life for George W. Bush. But probably a simpler life, one more suited to his talents."

That won't do.

He, with the rest of his accomplices, must be put behind bars.

I don't expect it to happen anytime soon, but if Milosevic ended up in jail, why not him?

Anne-arky said...

The first time Bush was elected, I was a plucky high school senior, unable to vote against him. So my friend and I got our heads together and discovered that if you put together the words, "Bush bites Dick Cheney Sucks," you can come up with a number of clever insults, depending on where you stick the punctiation.

"Bush bites, Dick Cheney sucks."
"Bush bites dick, Cheney sucks."
"Bush bites Dick Cheney, sucks."

Oh so mature...heh. Thank goodness I'm a grownup now, and beyond such things. *throws shoe*

Mr. Trombley said...

Dear Sir,

"..., imprisoned others illegally without trial,..."

My, but you repeat yourself.

Betül said...

"Get the hell of my property, bitch!" haha, I guess Obama is not the only person who would like to say that right now. What a well deserved shoe though. I loved this cartoon, any permission to use it in my blog with citation?

Bitter Animator said...

Sure, no problem! Glad you enjoyed it.

Leadora Congdon said...

Everything you say about GWB's failings may be true, but you make it sound like he was forcibly kicked out of office, but that's not the case.

He wasn't running for office against Mr. O , neither was he impeached from office. He served out his entire term of office and now the peaceful transfer of power (from one Harvard-educated globalist insider to another) has taken place.

And the beat goes on.

Bitter Animator said...

No, he wasn't forcibly booted. Or hauled up for war crimes. Shame.